I made such a lovely bento this morning!  It’s not so much that it’s cute, but it’s brightly coloured and looks and smells utterly delicious.  I made my bento and took my picture of it and then… it the chaos that is showering, dressing and getting to work… forgot to upload it to my computer.  It looks like you’re just going to have to wait for it.  I will tease you with a description of its’ contents though.  I used my Hello Kitty stackable bento today.  The bottom has yogurt soup (thick Greek yogurt, a splash of extra-virgin olive oil, grated cucumber, onion and garlic powder and cumin).  Next comes a small salad of microgreens and raw snow peas tossed with miso-mustard dressing.  Then there are mini pitas to dip in the soup.  Finally, I have chopped green apple, kiwi and blackberries.  Lovely.  Simple and lovely .

I have got to come up with new things to write about here.  I talk about work which, God knows, is not fascinating for me and certainly can’t be fascinating to read about.  I talk about working out and stress about being fat.  I talk about things Jesse and I did that are relatively mundane, especially as I leave out a lot of the funnier details for fear of making people feel excluded.  I stress about everything.  I talk a lot about food and cooking.  I agonize over how I can’t seem to write the way I used to.  I complain about all the things I want and don’t feel that I can have.  Ugh!  Why are you still reading?  Honestly, I don’t understand.  Today, the only exciting thing I can tell you is that yes!  I do remember how to ride a bike!  I almost feel like throwing a party but instead, I may just ride over to the park tonight and play tennis. 

I’m still working on my poetry collection, more things up at my archive.  I really need to go through my back-up CDs and pray to God that all of my old work is on there.  Otherwise, since my old harddrive crashed, I might be out of luck and it would be a shame to lose all that work.  I feel like I’m getting closer to my voice but it’s still evading me, just barely out of reach.  I just… I remember when this was easy.  Perhaps that’s just a consequence of being a teenager.  Now, knowing what I know about the process, having read more and explored more, understanding just how hard it is to fit words perfectly to feelings and situations, I know just how scared of it all I should have been.  Trying to do more sketching in an attempt to capture the mood, the bare outlines, before I actually have to put words to paper.  I’m not quite sure how that’s going to work out yet. 

Cresting waves.  I dreamed about them last night and this morning I woke up to more horrible pictures and news from the Midwest.  I’m so glad my parents are able to get away for a little while, if only to de-stress.  Then again, that just makes me worried about the cat — I wish I could have her here, even when she’s having a kitty-moment and gnawing on my wrists.  I miss having a curious little ball of fur around the apartment, the warmth and gentle vibration of a purring, sleeping cat curled up in the hollows of my stomach.  One day.